Healthy 31 year old??

I have always been a healthy female. Ok I have had my struggles with my weight. But who hasn't. I have my list of medicines I'm allergic to. I have normal blood pressure. I've never had anything massive but my wisdom teeth removed and I gave birth with no problems.

Well I'm sick. Yes it sucks. Yes it's not fair. Yes I hate my genetics that caused me to get this.

It all started in February. My left hand felt weird. Like I slept on it wrong on Monday. No pain. Just funny. Then I woke up Tuesday. My hand was swollen. I couldn't move my fingers and I was in pain. Aleve and Icy Hot. Still hurt. So I iced. Wednesday my right hand started to swelled and hurt. I could barely write. With both hands swollen it was almost impossible to lift my daughter or even hold her. Or do my job, but I embraced the pain and dealt with it.

Thursday I woke up in tears to both hands swollen. I couldn't put my hair back I could barely brush it. Everyone thought I had carpel tunnel. So I went to see the doctor on Friday. He referred me to the emergency room. At the ER they looked at me and told me I had carpel tunnel. But I asked about why was there a swollen red patch on my hand. They said that's weird, here Ice Ice Ice. So I went home thinking I had carpel tunnel. They very specifically told me they would not give me pain meds. To take aspirin. So instead of taking anything I dealt with the pain. I have a pretty high pain tolerance. Soon it went away. And i was thinking Cool. I'm so glad!!

Then the next week, on Tuesday I woke up to a swollen shoulder that literally paralyzed me in pain. I tried to go to work but when you can't even put deodorant on or your seat beat without bursting out crying you know you shouldn't go to work. So I called my primary doctor for an emergency appointment. By the time I went into her office I was in so much pain I was grinding my teeth. As she rotated my arm and elbow I felt the whole room start spinning and spinning out of control and a little tunnel of blackness started to form. Yes i was passing out from the pain. Which I have never ever passed out in my life so it's pretty scary.

Luckily my doctor is awesome and gave me a cortisone shot and started me on predinesone and naproxen. So I went home and felt tons better by the end of the day but still in pain.

In the process she did some blood tests to figure out what was going on with me. When she got the tests back she decided to refer me to a rhemotoidologist. My RA levels were up.

Most of you that know me, know my mom has RA. She's had it for almost 38 years. So yes that means she had the disease while she was pregnant with me. There would be a 30% chance I would get it.

And I'm that 30%.

Since seeing the rhemotodoligist, I have gone thru a million bloodtests, liver and kidney tests. Today I start my new medicine that will slow down the progression of this disease.

Methotrexate. This is the medicine that doctors used in the early 50's to terminate pregnancies. And this medicine is given to cancer patients with radiation. I'm scared. But i know i have to do this and I'm hoping for the best.

If anything I have to remember, I have to keep a positive attitude because if I let this become me then it define me.

I have my good days and I have my bad days. Today is a painfully bad day but I'm hoping to get thru it with the support of my friends and Dan. Luckily I have a wonderful-almost - 2 year old that helps me out a ton around the house. Even brings me my shoes when I can barely bend down.

My latest journey is eating better. I watched this video, Hungry for Change. I suggest it. It talks about how America glamorizes food. That natural, raw foods are how you should eat. It's pretty interesting. Since then I have been into Green Smoothies. I have them every morning and sometimes after work before dinner. What is a green smoothie you ask? It's spinach, Fat Free Organic Yogurt, Strawberries, ice, bananas, avocados, Alpha sprouts, collard greens. Whatever you want it to be blended and goodness right there.

I want to learn more about eating gluten free (there are studies that gluten can cause inflammations AKA flare ups for Fibro, RA and MS), raw foods and mostly veggie. I have never really cared for meat. I can do without it. Plus after the pink slime thing, what am I giving my child to eat!!??!! I want to give Brooke the best I can and teach her how to eat right.

So that's a little catch up on me. I don't want to be cryptic anymore but I don't want to shout it out on the hills. If you read this you will know. If you don't you don't but I still love you all!!